imisu…
Fixation*
I long for your touch…
I long for your scent…
I long for your warmth…
I barely had you…
Experienced you just twice yet your absence is eating away my insides…
I feel as if I’m rotting slowly…
Whenever I see my fingers, I feel yours entwined with them…
Our hands were made to be together…
The comfort of our temperature combined in the still air around us, air that seemed reluctant to move for it may bother our moment…
The television went mute the moment you sat beside me, afraid to drown the sound of our breathing…
You started leaning towards me and I forgot to breathe…
If being away from you means breathing normally, I’d rather die of suffocation.
Some wise guy from college (aka Prof) told me that we get fixated in stages in life that we don’t finish, e.g., oral stage, where we had to put everything in our mouths. A popular explanation why some people can’t quit smoking… hmm.. I guess I’m stuck in the “You Stage”, I long for that oh-so-illusive closure. I have to chase it no matter what. I’d be stuck on thinking of “What-could-have-been’s” and “What if’s”.
I don’t know when or how I will get over the “You” stage, for now, I’ll keep on nibbling on the bits and pieces of whatever’s left from our times together.
* a partial arrest of emotional and instinctual development at an early point in life, due to a severe traumatic experience or an overwhelming gratification. (http://dictionary.reference.com)
